Date: Friday, June 9, 2000

AUTHOR TURNS LIBRETTIST FOR GAY MEN'S CHORUS

by GEOFF GEHMAN, The Morning Call

J.A. Kawarsky was in a bookstore last year when he spotted a title begging to be yanked from the shelf: `'Alec Baldwin Doesn't Love Me' & Other Trials from My Queer Life.`

The choir director fell hard for the collection of humorous essays by the writer of the column and radio show, `My Queer Life.` Kawarsky enjoyed Michael Thomas Ford's queer insights on being addicted to all things Martha Stewart; being a Sunday schooler pestering a teacher with unanswerable questions about God; being an outsider seeking community. He decided Ford would be an excellent librettist for his composition for the Lehigh Valley Gay Men's Chorus' which he serves as artistic director.

Kawarsky's request floored Ford. The writer had never considered putting his words to music. He was concerned Kawarsky wanted to turn his words into a musical, a genre that, unlike many gay men, he pretty much despises. In fact, the fan of singer-songwriter Shawn Colvin claims as much in an essay on a surreal dinner with the Von Trapp family, who weren't nearly as attractive as they are in `The Sound of Music.`

Ford, however, likes to spelunk life's caves. He's the kind of experience athlete who spoofs his obsession with the chest hair of Kim Basinger's husband. `I thought it was such a weird idea,` he says of working with Kawarsky, `that I might as well try it.`

The result is six songs based on essays from three of Ford's books, one yet to be published. On Saturday the chorus will debut the Kawarsky-Ford cycle at Northampton Community College. `Alec Baldwin Doesn't Love Me` will star in the splashiest concert in the choir's six years.

The composition will be narrated by comic Paul J. Williams, who solos in the show `Left, Out . . . and Not Right!` It will be prefaced by the chorus' first celebrity, impersonator Tommy Femia. Two-time winner of an award from the Manhattan Association of Cabarets and Clubs, he will sample `The Magic of Judy` on the 78th anniversary of the birth of Judy Garland, an icon for gays along with diva Maria Callas, Martha Stewart and, yes, Alec Baldwin.

Kawarsky and Ford began their project by adapting a typically funny, sad dilemma. `How Can He See Me (When He's Looking at Her)` follows a young man attending a prom with a young woman, all the time desiring a more appropriate, less-tolerated partner. Ford's story unfolds to Kawarsky's waltz, an ideal messenger of bittersweetness.

The collaboration convinced Ford to continue as a rookie librettist. `I don't work and play well with others,` admits the author of young-adult books on AIDS awareness and gay role models. `But all my friends said this is how Elton John does all his songs, so I figured, hey, let's give it a shot.`

Another story, `If Jesus Loves Me, Why Hasn't He Called?" was Ford's choice of name for the `Alec Baldwin . . .` collection. It was vetoed, he says, because publishing honchos declared `gays don't buy books with Jesus in the title.`

Based on Ford's memories of Baptist bible school in Virginia, the tale machine-guns the provocative questions that drive teachers, and parents, bananas. Like: If Grandma calls every week, why doesn't Jesus? And: If we're all descended from Adam and Eve, how come we come in different colors?

Other tunes poke at sexual stereotypes and passions. `The Gay BCs` veers from country & western to disco as a green newcomer is tutored on those deities of song, fashion and angst: Liza and Barbra and Judy. `Alec Baldwin Doesn't Love Me Anymore` has been recast as a doo-wop about vying with Kim Basinger for her husband's affection. The conclusion is that Baldwin on video is better than no Baldwin at all.

The finale is an anthem carrying one of Ford's themes. `Right Here Where I Am` demands openness over hiding, self-acceptance rather than self-loathing, individuality within community.

`I think a lot of people like feeling that we have more in common than we have differences,` claims Ford, who has written of Christian-friendly action figures and a push-me, pull-you relationship with his Labrador. `We sit around and we all think we're so marginalized, and ghettoized, but we're not.

`Kids want picture books to reflect their lives without being about their lives,` adds the former editor of children's literature. `They want to see themselves reflected without their lives being a big deal.`

These statements are supported by demographics. Ford says his readings attract a healthy number of straight women. Kawarsky says the chorus's last poll revealed an audience that's half gay.

For Kawarsky, `Alec Baldwin ...` is more than a banner proclaiming a rainbow coalition. It's a light-hearted bookend to `Prayers for Bobby,` his 1996 composition addressing teen suicide. It's a calling card for the chorus's first appearance at a festival held every four years by the Gay and Lesbian Association of Choirs. In July, in San Jose, Calif., the local singers will join the likes of the Seattle Men's Chorus and the Turtle Creek Chorale, both with annual budgets over $1 million.

According to Kawarsky, `Alec Baldwin . . .` helps break predictable male-chorus programming: first classical, then folk, then maybe a little camp for dessert. `A gay men's chorus doesn't have to be a bunch of drag queens,` insists the founding artistic director of the New Jersey Gay Men's Chorus. `If you want that, there are certainly a lot of gay and straight drag bars out there. We want to keep audiences guessing. And we don't need to preach to the choir.`

Next week, the chorus will begin seeking a larger congregation by recording its first CD. The recording will feature `Mood Indigo,` `What Shall We Do with a Drunken Sailor?` and `Alec Baldwin Doesn't Love Me,` narrated by Ford.

Next year, the singers will interpret another ecumenical issue: raising awareness of, and money to prevent, breast cancer. They're scheduled to give the second performance of `Sing for the Cure,` written by a female librettist with 10 composers of both sexes and all sexual orientations. The chorus will team with an orchestra and Another Octave, a women's group from Connecticut, where a gay men's chorus has teamed with Tommy Femia and his `Magic of Judy` show.

Kawarsky has a sociologist's fascination with those fascinated by Garland. The composer is curious, for example, about the theory that the 1969 riot at the Stonewall gay bar in Manhattan was caused not only by police brutality, but sorrow for Garland's death a few weeks earlier.

`Icons are very present in our society as a whole,` reasons Kawarsky. `Look at all the kids wearing Nike sneakers just because Michael Jordan wore them. Hero worship exists so we can be someone we're not.

`A little bit of Judy goes a long way with me,` admits the composing conductor. `And don't look for a Maria Callas concert any time soon. There are few things I can promise in life, and that's one of them.`

One more question glows like Demosthenes' lantern, or Judy's red slippers in `The Wizard of Oz,` or the teeth of Kim Basinger's spouse. That is, if Alec Baldwin doesn't love Ford, does the activist writer at least deserve the crusading actor's respect?

`Well, Alec has written me several letters," notes Ford, whose third essay collection, `It's Not Mean If It's True,` is due in September. `He seems to have enjoyed (the essay ). He hasn't sued me, or the publisher. As far as I'm concerned, that's the best response of all.`

Ford even owns a copy of `Alec Baldwin` signed by Alec Baldwin. The autograph was given during a party attended by Ford's sneaky editor. If Ford ever needs a good laugh, all he has to do is read Baldwin's inscription: `But I do love you, Mike, I do.`

The Lehigh Valley Gay Men's Chorus will debut the song cycle `Alec Baldwin Doesn't Love Me" at 8 p.m. Saturday in Lipkin Theatre, Northampton Community College, Bethlehem Township. The performance will open with Tommy Femia's `The Magic of Judy,` a birthday salute to Judy Garland. Tickets: $18, $15, $12. There will be a silent auction to raise money for the chorus's trip to the GALA2000 Festival. 610-366-3320